Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Change Your Focus, Change Your Life

Change Your Focus, Change Your Life
By Bonnie Moehle, Life Balancing Coach

Did you know that you can change your life by simply changing your focus? What you focus on is what creates your experiences. If living feels difficult take a look at what you put your attention on. A simple shift in focus will change your life.
Joe was annoyed because he had taken time out of his busy work day to do something for an old friend. Joe was doing all of the work and getting nothing in return while the old friend was reaping all of the benefits of Joe’s time and energy. First of all, Joe should have said no to his friend if he was going to resent him for asking for the favor. But, since Joe had made a promise, he could change how he was feeling by changing his focus. Joe was putting all of his attention on what he was not getting rather than on the act of giving. When you focus on what you’re not getting you will always feel angry and resentful, but when you focus on what you are giving, unconditionally, you feel great. Giving to someone without any expectations of anything in return and doing it from a place of love becomes all the benefit you need. Then there is no annoyance or resentment toward the people you help and you feel really great inside.
Sue had difficulty because she always felt angry about the behaviors of the people around her. Sue was judging others through the filters of her own fears and insecurities. If Sue made a shift in her focus she would understand that nothing anyone says or does is about her. She would see through the eyes of love and wisdom and understand that the guy who cut her off in traffic is not a big jerk, but a concerned father on his way to the hospital because his child fell off the monkey bars at school. By shifting her perceptions, Sue no longer feels angry. That moment in her day becomes more peaceful, and she feels better about herself for choosing a perception of love rather than judgment.
Art was always finding fault with himself. As a result he took things personally, made judgments of others, said yes when he preferred to say no, and had a lot of conflict in his life. All Art needed to do was change his focus. However, when Art was a boy he was taught to put his attention only on the “bad” things he did, because “thinking about those bad things would make him better”. That was a lie. What we believe creates the way we behave. If you believe you are no good then you will feel no good and behave that way too. Art needs to shift his focus. During the course of daily life, Art is kind, thoughtful, honest, funny, creative, a good listener, etc… By focusing on the positive things that he does naturally every day, rather than taking them for granted, Art would have a completely different experience of himself, of others and of life. By changing his focus, Art would change his life.
Bonnie Moehle is a Life Balancing Coach and Author. Included in her teachings are the how to’s for letting go of stress, fears, worry, depression and anger. Her Life Balancing program is designed to promote joy, peace, health, better relationships and overall well-being. “I teach people to be happy”. For information or an appointment phone: 602-717-6228 or